Katy Nicholsonis one of those admirable women who speaks a variety of languages, feels at home in any social situation, can talk to anyone about almost anything, and who has wads of experience of adapting to different cultures. Katy was born and grew up in the US Midwest. This area is similar toScandinaviain its architecture with red wooden houses and barns. The people often have Scandinavian names and there is a definite Scandinavian feel about the place. When Katy arrived in Sweden in 1967 she therefore assumed that she would find things very much like “back home". Perhaps the exterior was similar but once Katy settled she soon realised that many things, including the Swedish mentality were very different and not easy for her to comprehend and adapt to. In those days no one talked about expats or cultural training or culture shock. Katy was left to get on with things and to find her own way of coping with the Swedish culture.Katy is a “love refugee". She met a Swede while studying in France and came here for the summer holidays with him. They spent their time sailing on the west coast, enjoying the long hours of sunshine and she soon fell in love with Sweden. They married and moved to Borås where her husband had been offered a trainee position. In Katy´s words “this was the worst year of my life"! It rained and rained and Borås was just not the place for a young , by then, pregnant American woman looking to meet people and do things. Katy amazingly learned Swedish in 6 months and started studying anthropology (in Swedish) after one year. She moved on to studying drama, with the help of a wonderful mother in law who helped out with baby sitting, and was eventually offered a job in the Drama department of Göteborg university. Katy had doubts about her qualifications for this position but was obviously extremely competent as she eventually became head of the department and she worked there for 20 years. Towards the end of the 1980s Katy was offered a 3 month exchange position at a university in Cairo. She was by now unattached and she loved it there so much that she applied to the AmericanUniversity for a position and was offered it. She stayed in Cairo for 3 years and met her British husband while living there. Katy´s life now became a very international one and she experienced how it felt to be an accompanying spouse. FromEgyptshe moved first toSwazilandand then to China. Of course Katy didn´t sit around waiting for things to happen she kept herself busy learning languages, directing plays and teaching English literature.
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| In the 1990s Katy moved back to Sweden and assisted her British husband to settle, adapt and learn the language. In the mid 90s she was out of work and had a hard think about what to do. She realised that her multi cultural experience could be put to use and this is when she started up her company “Cultural Competence". Katy was one of the first people to think along these lines. She currently runs intercultural training both for inbounds moving toSweden , to help them understand the Swedes and Sweden and for outbounds moving to other countries. She is also a certified coach and does intercultural coaching. I first met Katy when I assigned her to run classes for inbounds at Volvo Cars. I often attended these courses and learned a lot both from Katy but also by listening to the experiences of the recently arrived expats and their spouses.When Katy was young she always wanted to go to Norway. She met a Norwegian foreign exchange student at school and this woman is still Katy´s best friend. Katy learned Norwegian and all about Norwegian culture so somewhere in there was an affinity withScandinavia , even in her early life.
Like all of us Katy faces misunderstandings along the path of settling in to a new culture She wore a kilt when studying at Göteborg university in the 70s. This was a skirt she had owned for years. She said she was unfairly judged by others because of this. She was seen to be a right wing conservative based on this one item of clothing. Another culture shock that Katy experienced was when she was invited to a dinner party by her, then, parents in law. She was used to having discussions at the dinner table and her “you can´t really believe that" and interest in discussing controversial topics just broke the rules of what a nice Swedish dinner party is meant to be, usually a gathering where everyone tends to agree. This lack of willingness to deal with any type of conflict here in Sweden has been something Katy has had to come to terms with but has found very frustrating, at times.
When Katy was first offered a position at Göteborg university she received a letter informing her of this. It was worded in such an official and bureaucratic tone that she thought she had been unsuccessful. Katy´s tips for expats moving to Sweden are to maintain a sense of humour and to be able to laugh at what you are going through. She also suggests that you do not lose sight of where you want to go and to make the most of any opportunities even though they may not be exactly what you had in mind. Flexibility is the key here. She actually didn´t mention learning Swedish as she said she thought this was so obvious. OK, Swedes do speak good English but you cannot be part of a team or social group unless you speak Swedish. This is the key to understanding the Swedish mentality and the way to learn about Swedish traditions and culture. Katy finished with some words worth thinking about. She said it is important to take what ever comes along and turn it into a gift and quoted what a friend had said to her “learn to blossom wherever you are planted". Wise words indeed!
In conclusion I would just like to say that I would welcome contact from expats. You may have a suggestion as to someone I could interview, a question or you would perhaps like to comment on something I have written. Please feel free to contact me on: sandra@safety-first.se. |
